Find yourself

Find yourself ....

Lot of my friends and co workers I always felt where at peace ...and this kept me wondering "How"and why iam not relaxed .... Just the chill sort.
Took to heart and my search began ... Find your self ... Read countless books , journals articles....
It added to confussion
Somewhere inside me I felt what is this"find Yourself"....iam what I am ... But then who iam ...
The day arrived ...
They say the Teacher appears when the student is ready ....
I was at this woman seminar and met legendary " Sindhutai Sapkal".... My question was silly but felt it was right from the heart ... " Mam I want to do something ... For society... Less fortunate... Iam actually confused... But I want to do something "
She smiled and said " did you discuss this with self?"
I was more confused ...
She said relax .... Smile ... Relax .... Listen the deep inner voice .... What you are telling me is what is on the surface of your thought process .... Listen to self voice , is this the same that is deep down in you and your heart ?
First be friend with yourself , spend more time with self and you will get the answer.
To get any answer you need peace first ... Confussion and chaos can lead to a wrong answer.
.......
I was at peace .... I found myself in BMI trust ... My little NGO .... Which is my self.


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Facing the Past continues.....

Life's management is very complex... Many things you do just to regret later. 
Then the question arises why do certain things ... But life is such a canvas that every day every moment you fill it with various color of emotions and yes just when we want to improve our paintings later in life we feel that there should have been provision of correction but sadly that's not there. 
In life you have to finish one chapter to start reading the next one. 
Reading many chapters simultaneously brings a lot of chaos and confusion in life and hence it's advisable to take one step at time, it maight take a little long but will surely reach a safe goal. 
Many tough lessons have come when I look behind and as peace is there I am in perfect mind to read them with clear mind and heart. 
Most important is TIME never ever waste it cause you can earn back everything but once the time has gone will never come back. Use it sparsely on right cause and for the right people. 
Keep away from those negative wibes as they give you nothing but drain you each and every moment. Someone wisely mentioned that if you lose an hour in the morning you will be searching it for the next 23 hours a day. 

Facing past continues....

When she looks behind in this peace of today the past appears to be cloudy... As the eyes are filled with tear drops that are not ready to fall in her present as they will create more chaos.
She is not blaming anyone .. No excuse .. No regrets.
Just a question to self ..? Don't you think there was a better approach to life? Without making it so complex and complicated.
Maturity follows after a few setbacks? Very weird but true .. You value things only when you have either lost them or they have left you ... I am talking about TIME the biggest culprit , come what may it just goes on and moves on.
You can lose any thing in life and earn that back but once the TIME has gone it will not come back.
While we were young always heard elders advising us that Don't waste time... Time is money.. Time is precious...
It is and that's the Fact.
Use it with care.
Make use of your life .. Make it worthy.... Something you will be proud of.

Facing the Past continues.....

Some painful and unattended thoughts that she had buried deed ,surfaced.
Distinctly she remembered that it was a Friday and she was very excited that this weekend is going to be very special for her.She was on the invite list of the Book Inauguration function....dress accessories ...makeup ...all was set in her mind without confusion.
He came from work and was in a good mood , not those irritating mood.
She just mentioned that tomorrow she is going to this book inauguration function and the excitement was overflowing. He sternly looked at her and asked who are accompanying and she gave the names of friends... He replied then you can go cause I would not have allowed you alone.
Suddenly she crashed.....she was given permission because of her friends? Doesn't he trust me?
After all these years ...
Then the analysis started ...it's not religion... Not the gender inequality .... It's the male attitude ...
Or is it they see the world as they think.
She did not go .... Of course one more chapter of suppression ...
She did not ask , he did not say .... 

Facing the Past

The silence in the house is rarest and I really don't recollect when I had experience.
Actually it's not the silence in the house it's peace in mind .. So very weirded once you are peaceful deep in everything around you is so peaceful... That's natures rule.
When there is peace inside and out then this dreadful time comes when the past starts coming in front of you.
When there is peace than that means there is no expectations from anyone so then you and only you are responsible for your past. Whole life you spent fast doing every job thrown at you many a time mechanically not giving much thoughts on the results. As time flies you get used to the outcomes whether right or wrong and move on ... Those actions now come in peace.
They say Past comes haunting ... When in peace.
It never leaves you lonely. 

"Two sides of Tears"

"Two sides of tears"
I always knew that looking back on the tears would make me laugh but I never knew that looking back on the laughs would bring tears...
Never believed in negative writing neither I intend  to glorify negativity through this blog, but the Truth is that you are unable to see the power of light if you don't know darkness, unless you drench yourself in rains you won't enjoy the rainbow, unless you have experienced hatred you won't feel the power of love.
Our eyes are windows of our heart , you can force a smile on your face but eyes don't lie... Not always the tears that  roll down your cheeks are indicating hurt or pain. They also roll down without permission when a less fortunate smiles and blesses you after the meal box you give him.
Even when you help the old lady across the busy road , or when you save the little homeless pup in the stormy night.
We experience these deepest emotions only when our heart and mind are totally involved ..this happens not very often cause mind and heart speak different languages.
Take care and keep smiling always. 

Shadows chase.....

Someone rightly said always look at the sun , so you never see the shadows.
Life is full of drama and yes the script is not known and their is no stage prompter for it.Life's practicality is like a boxing game you are not declared defeated when you fall down but when you refuse to get up.As long as we do not forgive people who have hurt us, they occupy a Rent Free space  in our mind ... The same is with the bad memories, defeat and failure from past that haunt us. Our Hopes should be like Hair and Nails, no matter how many times they get cut , they never stop growing. Always Hope for the best however the bad situation may be. The best way to quote here -

Once Buddha was Travelling with a few of his followers.
While they were passing a lake , Buddha told one of the disciple "  I am thirsty. Do get me some water from the lake "
The disciple walked up to the lake. At that moment a bullock cart started crossing through the lake making the water muddy and turbid.
The disciple thought " How can I give this water to Buddha to drink."
So. He came back and told Buddha "The water is muddy. I don't think it's fit to drink."
After about half an hour, again Buddha asked the same disciple to go back to the lake.
The disciple went back and found that the water was still muddy.
He returned and informed Buddha about the same.
After sometime, again Buddha asked the same disciple to go back.
This time , the disciple found the mud had settled down and water was clean and clear.
So he collected some water in a pot and brought it to Buddha.
Buddha looked at the water , and then looked up to the disciple and said," See what you did to make the water clean. You let it be, and the mud settled down on its own , and you have clear water.
You don't have to put in any effort to calm it down.
It will happen effortlessly. "
Having Peace of Mind is not a strenuous job, it is an effortless process so keep your mind cool and have a peaceful life ahead with no shadows of muddy past chasing you.
Life is all about living for one another so live life to the fullest.
Relationships cannot be understood by the language of money because some investments ever give profit but they make us RICH